Many people ask me about why they are not healing or how long it will take to heal. There is no straightforward answer to this, yet part of the obstacle to healing is very much pandemic in society. This is tied up with over-active mental processes and destructive inner dialogue. The mind has become a false God in society and there is an incredible amount of “power of the mind” and intellectualisation bandied about. Yet the mental is very much meaningless and ungrounded and washes around aimlessly when it is not directed by the heart and supported by the instinct and deep sense of self. I am seeing many people in overwhelm and experiencing destructive mental chatter with very little anchoring of thoughts into meaningful actions. You may be seeing it in the people around you or feeling it happening in your own self. It is time for us to take charge of our own inner world and inner dialogue so that we can make a conscious heartfelt change to “the norm” or tiredness, exhaustion, frustration and hurt. You may wonder why I am referring to these things as “the norm”. I have heard it from so many people. “I’m just getting old and therefore this is normal” … I have never been able to sleep well, therefore this is normal” … “I’m a busy mum so I can’t be expected to feel any better than this” … “Life is just like that”.
What state are you in? Is it really what you want? Get curious about the stories that you have that are determining how you are feeling in yourself. They can be illuminating when we get really honest with ourselves and recognise how they are limiting us. What I have witnessed and what I know in myself is that the people who recover more quickly are the people who are willing to take responsibility for finding their own answers and have the courage to connect with their feelings.
Returning this week from our annual Australian Kinesiology Association conference I am feeling an even greater pull in my purpose for supporting people to function at their greatest capacity of living joyfully from the heart and soul. We have the ability to embody this in our every choice and movement and yet there is so much frustration, hostility, pain, exhaustion and emotional turmoil going on in this world . One very strong point from our conference stood out to me which captures my purpose in the way I work with Kinesiology and teaching the expressive dance practice of Nia. This was a common thread throughout many of the presentations… Our body is designed to be led by the heart and when we can connect with this part of ourselves we can heal in the most extraordinary ways. When we stand in the body’s natural posture, the heart is slightly forward of the head, which suggests that we are designed to Govern from the heart. Many of the ancient wisdoms have know of this for years. We have seen recently what a disconnection from the heart can do with the tragic deaths in New Zealand. It has been heartening to see a Government, Jacinda Ahern beautifully model leadership. It is now put plainly in front of us, do we give energy to our heart and inner soulful intelligence or do we give energy to the disconnects that are our obstacles to our heartfelt, soulful self. It is time for us all to step up into true power and be discerning about how we are Governing our own self and our own life. So I wanted to start with this simple notion.
Feel.
Have the courage to be completely honest with how you feel. Have the compassion to allow your feelings to arise without judging them or making them into a story. Give yourself the gift of feeling so that you can be guided to feel better.
Feelings are a powerful guidance system. We need to feel to heal. We can’t heal while we are closed to our feelings because of fear of being hurt. Shutting out the hurt, also shuts out the joy and pleasurable which can arise out of healing from the hurt. Feelings are the guide to healing choosing a better way, the way out of the hurt. So no matter how painful those feelings are, let them rise and move. Emotions are in fact temporary states of being, and by feeling them we honour that process of allowing them to move. If you don’t believe me just observe a young child for a day and see how many emotions they move through. As adults we have the intelligence to witness them rather than act them out. By denying them, suppressing them or avoiding them we block that process and become stuck with pain, frustration or exhaustion.
Feelings, give the awareness to hear and respond to our primary needs.
For example if you are aware of thirst, you can drink to respond to your need for hydration and water in the body. If you feel physical pain, the body is warned about damage to the system and can mobilise physical healing responses. If you feel emotional pain, you can become aware of unmet emotional needs and respond with an appropriate action such as conscious choice, love or nurturing space.
In essence, when we remain in communication with our heart and feelings, we open to receive more of our soulful passions and purpose.
For a practical daily action to stay connected with this aspect of yourself, start your day by gifting yourself with stillness. Take 5 minutes of time and space to connect with your feelings. Slow and deepen your breath to access the peaceful loving state of the heart and sense what it is feeling and longing to give and receive on this day.
It is one thing to know all this and it can be another to put it all into practice and embody a whole new state of being. If your heart is pulling you and your body or mind are holding you back, I am here to help. Together we can explore the landscape of your body, heart and mind to find the answers for you to find your own way in healing.